Witching Hour

"Doubts" was originally written by my angsty 14 year old self. It is published in Beneath The Mask Literary Magazine Issue 6 April 2025. https://beneaththeemask.wixsite.com/website/general-8. Trigger Warning for Self-Harm. 

Doubts

This boy.
This boy who thinks he loves me; 
He knows my pensive look well,
My cute habit of
Binging fruit loops at
11 at night when he hasn’t
Even called.

He cries about insomnia 
At 3am and
I speak to him in lullabies 
Till he’s cradled off 
Near sleep. 
A heart only half awake,
He says he wishes to be 
As special as I am—

And then he dreams 
Of sex and psychedelics
And I take my night time sedative
Of skin cells dying
By pencil sharpener blades;
I sleep with my bedsheets 
In my fists,
Clinging to where I know he’ll 
Want to love me.

He smokes weed 
To forget his problems;
He doesn’t know 
When he’ll 
Forget me. 

A tired soul; 
I bet he thinks
The most special thing in me 
Is that I live 
To sing him 
To sleep.


"Witching Hour" was originally written by my angsty 16 year old self. It is published in Beneath The Mask Literary Magazine Issue 6 April 2025. https://beneaththeemask.wixsite.com/website/general-8.

Witching Hour

When I 
Was six years old,
Witches
Lived in my vent
So I slept 
With my back to it –
I face it now. 

I call
To the witches,
Take me
Please!
Four years gone 
And his spells still linger 
In my nightmares.

I call for dark magic, 
For omnipotence 
Greater than his eyes.
When he is
Reciting rhymes,
I spy wands and rattlesnakes
And spell books for gaslight
On his bedside.

A haunting of retrospect
In lovelessness –
You monsters masked
His voice of animosity 
With charm
And you play it
Through my pillows;
Through my vents. 

I was always
Most afraid 
Of the things I felt 
Sleeping beside me
After I turned off 
The lights,
But now
By those who aren’t.

He’s a ghost,
A hex, 
A man most intentional,
The truly wicked –
A perfect ex.

3 to 4 is witching hour;
I’ve been stuck in it 
For years.